(something clever)-iPodcast.

I spent all weekend dousing myself in gasoline.  In this case, gasoline is a metaphor for boredom and feathers.

I needed a project.  It's been 5 (yes 5) years since le /backslash debuted.  4 years to the month since the cliffhanger of season one.  I've had nothing NOTHING creative to do in that time frame.  I've made DJ mixes which were received with lukewarm shrugs, but that's ok.  It'll get better.  I'm crafting le perfect blog-mix as we speak.  Promise.

Butt there's more.  Z and I will win the 48 hour film festival this summer.  That's a fucking promise.  If we don't win it'll be because we entered two films and our other film won instead.

So you've got two Hammer brothers, two men over the height of 6'2", oozing pride, trophies, and juices.  Throw in a couple new iPerrd Terrches, and that's a recipe for disaster.  Just add water and self-promoting podcast.

Yes.  Podcast futures await you.

Bet on it.  Like it was the first face card you've seen all night...

And hold on. And hold tight.

Britney?

More like Bratney.

They're getting the band back together...

I'll take these 9 against your 9 any day.

Missle Destroys Satellite, Kid from War Games Blamed.

Get me a WOPR!

Random thoughts for a Thursday night.

==> The NBA trade deadline came and went.  Tony Kukoc didn't get traded ANYWHERE this year.  The fuck is all that about?

==> I'm trying my damnedest to keep up with the political dealings of campaign season.  But all this talk of delegates and Superdelegates and Superdelegates: Turbo and Superdelegates: Tournament Edition have me all confused.  If I were in charge I'd just pick one person from each side and then vote.

==> The Lindsay Lohan/Marilyn Monroe/Nude photos have created quite a buzz this week.  I saw a few of them onlines, and they're pretty nice.  I mean, if you're into that sort of thing (girls).

==> State legislators in Iowa are debating on whether or not to ban smoking in all public establishments, including restaurants.  Kind of a big deal around here.  Personally, I don't like to have other people smoke around me while I'm out to eat.  But I do love to eat smoked turkey sandwiches, which puts me in kind of a pickle.  I don't like pickles on my sandwich though.  Maybe just a little mayonnaise, some lettuce perhaps, and that's all.  I'd go with a wheat bun or bread.  Try to keep it healthy, you know?  Maybe have a little cottage cheese on the side, some potato chips, and a nice glass of lemonade.  I'd want to sit down with some friends, have a chat while we enjoy our lunch.  One guy would make jokes about race, and then we'd laugh but feel bad.  Another guy would probably eat soup, cause places that sell smoked turkey sandwiches also usually sell soup.  I've never been a big fan of the chowder & cream-style soups, but I like most things you can put crackers in.  No, that wasn't a reference to the race joke from earlier.  I mean crackers as in saltines or maybe those little oyster crackers you can buy.  I've never had actual oysters before, but they say that a lot of exotic seafood is a natural aphrodisiac.  So is lube.

==> I can't fucking wait for baseball to begin.

==> Just so you know....NBA GM's...

   +      =   

Jason Kidd Traded To Mets

It's time for something fresh.  I mean that in the honest sense of the word.  Out the oven.

I just got me-self a new iPod Touch.  It makes me feel accomplished and creative and worthy.  That's what tangible things are for, right?

So, what lie ahead:

1. A SERIOUS write-up about the NBA's second half.

2. A random review of some of the latest blog tracks to hit the internates.

3. More comedy.

4. Pictures of me with my iPod Terrch in various forms of sex.

5. A catphe myspace/facebook/match.com website?  (no)

6. Other.

Go get it Pau:

Wheel suck!

No, actually, your commercial suck.  Suck dick.

The Giants won.  But that's not the real story here.  The real story is that the Patriots lost.  That makes them (probably) the first team ever to go into a Super Bowl with a perfect record of 20-2 and LOSE!  So, Titans, Bucs, Giants...hold your helmets high!  You all stopped a perfect (pre)/reg/post season.

The ads.  Talked to Z tonight to see what I should blog about, and it only seems right that we discuss the Bud Light ads.

1. Bud Light "Ability To Breathe Fire".  Bud Light allows you to breathe fire?  Since when?  Seems kind of dangerous, as shown in the commercial itself.  What would've happened later if the guy had tried to kiss her "other" kitty?  (do you catch my drift of wind?).  Ouch indeed.

2. Bud Light "Cheese & Wine Party".  The guys hide their Bud Light bottles in various secret compartments (cheese wheel, baguette, ...).  I'm sure there was no need to hide the beer.  They were going to a party where alcohol was going to be served anyways.  I don't see the crime in bringing over a 6-pack of beer for yourself to drink.  Just tell your girlfriend that you don't like wine that much.  And then you can bring an ACTUAL wheel of cheese to enjoy while you drink beer.

3. Bud Light "Carlos Mencia Helps Losers Meet Girls".  This was just gay.

4. Bud Light "Wheel Suck".  This one is confusing.  a) How did the cavemen get ice?  From the looks of the commercial they seem to be in a very arid environment.  And a warm one to boots.  So, even if there was water present, it wouldn't be frozen.  Also, b) when was Bud Light invented?  I'm guessing probably not way back then.  So I was kind of surprised to see them with BOTH ice and Bud Light bottles.  But that's not even the worst part.  The caveman guy who invented the wheel?  He didn't take the time to explain to his friends that one wheel won't help accomplish the task of getting the ice & beer to the party at the top of the hill.  They need 2, and probably 3 or 4 wheels (as well as axles) to get it all to work properly.  So many errors.  Where is Bud Light's advertising quality control?  The ending is so true though.  That bottle opener do suck!

5. Bud Light "Ability To Fly".  This is halfway true.  If you drink enough Bud Light you might FEEL like you can fly.  That's just an after-effect of the alcohol on your mental comprehension and motor skills.  Or what it feels like when you jump off a hotel balcony after you've had too many.  Hey, it can happen.

DOUBLE STUFF RACING LEAGUE DUAL CHAMPIONSHIP 07 08

HAMMER BROTHERS FANTASY DUAL CHAMPIONSHIP 07 08

Eery...