[catastrophenom]

Monday, December 31, 2007

Sean Taylor not expected to start Sunday at Seattle.

"Playoffs!?! You're talkin' bout playoffs?!?!" -Allen Iverson

That's right it's playoff time in the National Football League, so what better time to take a look back at the year that was (it was 2007).

Best Team: Tie--Tennessee Titans and Tampa Bay Buccaneers. In a season where the New England Patriots went 16-0, these two teams both BEAT the Patriots. In the preseason. Those games count too (they even keep score), and if you can beat a team that ultimately goes 16-0 later that year, then you've used some sort of magic spell or potion or both. So, in essence, Jeff Garcia > Tom Brady.

Best Player: Patrick Willis, LB, San Francisco 49ers. Willis led the entire NFL in tackles with 174. Most tackles = best player. It's tackle football for Pete's sake! And for the sake of our nation and the troops that protect us.

Most mind-boggling stat: The Oakland Raiders and the Pittsburgh Steelers both ran EXACTLY 1000 plays from scrimmage this year. WOW! 1000!!! Exactly! WOW! Not to be outdone, the Kansas City Chiefs ran 1001 plays. WHAT!? 1001!!! Ridiculous! Exactly ONE more than those two teams!!

***PLAYOFF PREDICTIONS***

Wild Card Round :

Seattle 35, Washington 14. I bet this will be the score.

Jacksonville 31, Pittsburgh 29. This is my guess for what the score will be. I predict that Jacksonville will lead by 17-19 points in the 4th, almost lose the game, and then win the game with a late FG or something.

Tampa Bay (at least 7), New York ?. I haven't fully predicted this game yet.

San Diego ?, Tennessee ?. I'll predict this game later.

Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Iowa Cock-us. See what I did there? Cock.

Time for randomness. Slow things down a bit, ya know?

Ike Turner died the other day. I like Ike. Or should I say, I LIKED Ike! (past-tense).

Britney Spears' little sister got knocked up. And I don't mean she went out and bought the DVD of the movie Knocked Up. I mean some dude put sperm into her beaver. He came. That's how it works.

The Miami Dolphins finally won their first game of the season this week. Just a fact.

Browsing through Best Buy the other day for some holiday gift giving ideas. Strolled through the DVD aisle and came across this old classic:

I loved how for a long time a bunch of people thought the movie was real. Nope. TOTALLY CGI. In fact, "Finding Nemo" is the sequel to this. It's true. The actual title for this is "The Blair Witch Project: Losing Nemo". And then when "Finding Nemo" came out they just dropped the Blair Witch part. I get asked this all the time, but why don't you see Nemo or his dad in the first movie at all then? Exactly...he was fucking lost! That's the point of the movie. Did you not see the previews!? Plus, I don't think the animators had the skills or computing power to do CGI fish quite yet, so they had to make due.

Magic Johnson was campaigning in Iowa today for Hillary Clinton for President of U.S. I think that's a good endorsement to have. Cause beating AIDS is a tough thing to do, but so far he's seemed to have done it. That gives Hillary the edge versus whichever candidate gets endorsed by Africa.

Pssst. Found him. ====>

Sunday, December 16, 2007

Further Proof.

Ok, this'll probably be the last I talk about baseball's steroid issue. It's all over the newswaves this week.

Enemy #2 (he hasn't passed Osama yet), is still Barry Bonds, and it's understandable. After time and time again vehemently denying ever using performance-enhancing drugs, many skeptics have pointed to this photographic evidences that Bonds has increased in muscle size dramatically over the past few years.

Nice point. But through the magic of the internet I have found FURTHER proof that Mr. Bonds is a user and abuser of growing pills. The photo of Barry on the left was most likely taken before the steroid-era of the late 1980s and definitely taken before the andro/HGH craze of 1998. Compare that with the photo on the right, and I think you've got yourself a crime guy. GUILTY as spin I say.